ABOUT

Synopsis

“I lived transgender, but I left it all to follow Jesus.” So explains self-identified ‘ex-trans’ Jeffrey, whose belief that change is possible reflects the core message of the conversion therapy movement today.

In the 1970s, five men struggling with being gay in their Evangelical church started a bible study to help each other leave the "homosexual lifestyle." They quickly received over 25,000 letters from people asking for help and formalized as Exodus International, the largest and most controversial conversion therapy organization in the world.

Julie is one of hundreds of thousands of people caught in Exodus’ wake. When she came out at sixteen, her mom took her to a residential conversion therapy program where she spent the next decade going through weekly psychological, behavioral, and religious counseling to make her straight.

But leaders struggled with a secret: their own “same-sex attractions” never went away. After years as Christian superstars in the religious right, many have come out as LGBTQ, disavowing the very movement they helped start. PRAY AWAY chronicles that movement’s rise to power, persistent influence, and the harm it causes.

Director’s Statement

Though PRAY AWAY is not a personal film, the topic is of personal significance to me. PRAY AWAY was inspired by my religious background and close ties to a conversion therapy survivor. My uncle, who was like a second father to me, went through conversion or "reparative" therapy after coming out as trans as a child. Depression, anxiety, addiction, and suicidal ideations followed until his recent unexpected death.

His experience prompted my initial research on the subject. After I discovered a group of former leaders and their work to make the “pray the gay away” movement what it thrives as today, I realized that my uncle’s experience was part of something larger and more strategic than I’d originally imagined. He was one of hundreds of thousands of LGBTQ individuals deeply harmed by this movement. I finally understood the depth of his hope that change was right around the corner. Those leading this movement were fellow LGBTQ people claiming to have changed themselves.

But these discoveries were only the beginning. When I started my research, I assumed, like many, that my uncle’s experience was a thing of the past. What I found is that the “pray the gay away” movement is alive and well today.

Having filmed with active leaders in the movement, I know that many have good intentions. Many believe that they are helping people. They’ve been convinced by peers, counselors, pastors, family members, and a complicated belief system that change is possible. But I’ve also filmed with and met with survivors of this movement who have everlasting scars from the trauma they endured. I witnessed that trauma in my family firsthand. Many don’t make it out of the movement alive. Despite any good intentions, that is the reality of this movement.

My ultimate goal is to tell the truth of the "pray the gay away" movement's enduring harm. I hope that  in a few years following the film’s release, a family member or struggling LGBTQ Christian searching for information on conversion therapy finds PRAY AWAY, learns about our subjects’ compelling stories, and finds their way to affirmation and self-acceptance.

-Kristine Stolakis